Painful Existence
by Melannen Halfelven
Summary: A story from the pov of Saetan's grandchild . . . . read and review!
1. Chapter 1

This is my first Black Jewels Tril. fic. I hope you all like it. The more reviews I get, the more often I'll update. This is told from the pov of Anduvian who is . . . . well, you'll just have to read and find out. R&R!

I shouldn't exist. I should never have been born. I am a curse, a shameful thing. They look at me and smile, out of pity. I do not want their pity or their compassion. They only stand my presence because my mother was the Queen of Ebon Askavi, and my father . . . . . . well, they all try not to tangle with him. That is all that stands between me and death. They resent me, you can see it in their eyes, but they would not dare say anything. I am an sapphire-jeweled queen, and a natural black widow, and I haven't even made the Offering yet. You could say that I was Hekatah's last-ditch attempt to destroy the High Lord of Hell. You could say she succeeded. No one knows how she did it, but, whatever the case, it was cruel. I am the daughter of Lucivar Yaslana and Jaenelle Angeline.

I sat by the gurgling stream, occasionally dipping my hand in the cool water. He was Eyrien, and therefore arrogant, it was only expected that he would act like an ass most of the time. Though his words hurt nonetheless. Palanar and I had been sparring with the sticks when he had told me he did not need to waste his time with an inbred, bastard mongrel. Then he said something which stung my heart like an ice-coated dagger. Perhaps I would fit in better if they had cut off my wings. I broke his nose.

I turned around when the snap of twigs betrayed Daemonar's presence. He sighed and shook his head.

"I should have broken all his bones, not just his nose." I growled. Daemonar looked at me skeptically. "Father taught me how." He paled.

He squatted down beside me. "What Palanar said was wrong, but you should not have lashed out like that."

"You're defending him!" I nearly yelled.

"No, I'm not. You are a Queen, and I just think that you should have come to me so I could have done it for you." he shrugged. "Palanar deserved what he got, and what I am going to give him."

He can be _so_ male sometimes.

We both laughed, but it was short-lived. "You can't tell father." I said solemnly.

"Why not?" he snapped.

I bit my lip. "You know how he gets when someone says . . . . . . something like that."

He huffed dramatically. "Andie, he is going to find out either from you or someone else. You might as well go ahead and tell him."

My snarl melted into a sob as I clung desperately to his shirt. He wrapped his arms around me while I cried. The words hurt so badly sometimes. Each one a little more than the last. I had been enduring their taunting since before I could remember. Even as a child, I had been seen as inferior. Their hatred was even worse because I outranked them and they despised the fact.

I didn't know how long I had sat there in his lap, but eventually Daemonar broke the silence.

"We had better go, Mother will have dinner ready soon." I looked up at him, and we both knew the last thing I wanted to do was confront either of our parents. He lifted me up and brushed the grass off my shoulders and back. "Come on."

I followed, reluctantly. Daemonar shot up into the sky once we were free of the trees and I followed, reluctantly.

The first thing I heard upon entering the eyrie was "Daemonar! Take off your boots, they're filthy!" Well, mother was home, that much was certain. My brother reentered the small room which held all of the things mother deemed 'too dirty for inside.' After imitating her order in a strange silly voice and taking off his boots, he went back into the kitchen.

Avoiding my mother I made my way back into my bedroom. I was _not_ in the mood to deal with anyone right now. I plopped down on my bed and called in a book Jaenelle had lent me. I could not call her mother, because, as far as I was concerned, my mother was a Purple Dusk hearth witch with an obsession for cleanliness. Daemonar had chauffeured it from the Hall, keeping graciously quiet about its contents. Now, if Father knew about _that_ he _would_ be pissed.

A slight knock a couple of minutes later gave me enough time to vanish it before Daemonar came in.

"Reading?" I nodded. "Father's home." I had sensed the darker power, so I was not surprised.

"Lucky me."

"He knows. Hallevar told him."

"Shit."

He smiled sympathetically, but before he could speak Father opened the door and came in. Actually, he blew it off its hinges.

"ANDUVIAN!" I gulped. "Tell me what happened, now."

"Nothing." I resisted the urge to hide.

He looked at me skeptically and grinned. That grin did not bode well for the person who received it, me. "Geoffery told me that Daemonar had gotten you a particular book . . . ." I felt the blood drain from my head before being immediately replaced by a vibrate blush.

By the time I was finished recounting the entire ordeal, I had a bad feeling I would not be seeing Palanar uninjured for a very long time.

"Oh, your mother wants to see you." his words snapped me back to reality.

"Alright, tell her I'll be out in a minute."

"No, your mother." he put emphasis on the last word, and I could tell he was very uncomfortable.

"Alright." I hastily packed an overnight bag, since Daemon always insisted I stay for a few days, and went out to the landing platform before catching the Sapphire winds.

As soon as I landed in front of the Hall and took a few steps, Daemonar crashed down behind me. He must have been right behind me the entire time.

"What are you doing here?" I snapped, my temper already at the fraying point.

He shrugged. "What does it look like I'm doing here?"

I studied him for a moment. "It looks like you are expecting to raid Mrs. Beale's kitchen."

He snarled. "Not after the last episode."

I laughed. "Come on you goof."

Beale greeted us at the door, giving me a despairing look when Daemonar entered behind me. I just smiled sweetly and half-ran, half-flew up the stairs. Turning around to see if my brother was behind me, I barreled into Daemon, knocking us both off of our feet. He had enough sense to put barriers around himself so he didn't slam into the hard, tile floor, but I wasn't so fast.

Groaning, I eased myself up just in time to have Daemonar topple over both of us.

"I am going to kill you one day Daemonar." Daemon growled standing up and offering me a hand. My brother ignored him, loftily studying a painting on the wall. _Well, at that rate, he was just asking for it._ Taking the offered hand, I stalked over to my brother and punched his shoulder, flinging every curse I knew at him. Too late, I realized Daemon might have known a few of the Eyrien ones.

I grabbed my brother's collar and yanked him down the hall. "What are you some kind of an idiot?" I whispered furiously once we were out of earshot.

"Mrs. Beale came in."

"Oooh, so you ran."

"No."

"Admit it."

"I wasn't running away."

"You were."

"Was not."

_Yas' whelp is here!_ Ladvarian bounded up to greet us. He sniffed Daemonar's pant leg and scrunched up his nose, sneezing. I gave him a friendly scratch behind the ear and entered the study.

Jaenelle was staring out of a far window, her long blonde hair was loosely tied away from her face.

"Lucivar told me what happened." Before I could respond she spoke again. "I have arranged for you to stay at the Keep for a while."

The tone in her voice told me not to argue.

_What are you talking about?_ Daemonar asked on a Sapphire thread.

_I'm going to the Keep._

_I'm going with you._ He said.

_I don't mean to eavesdrop but no, Daemonar, you're not_. the deep cultured baritone made me jump.

_Stop me._

_Daemonar do have a death wish or something_? I asked, peeved.

"Anduvian, did you hear a word I was saying?"

Jaenelle's voice was a welcome reprieve from the snarling males.

"Sorry, no."

"I will have a carriage prepared, you will leave in an hour or so."

I nodded. "Can Daemonar come with me?"

"Mother night." She grumbled at the mention of his name. "Yes! Take him before he and Daemon decide to raze this whole building to the ground!"

I laughed, I just couldn't help myself.

"What is so funny?"

"I was just thinking the same thing, that's all."

She lifted her eyebrow at me, and I just shrugged. "Go find you fiendish brother and tell him he can go."

I opened the door and Daemonar was standing there. _Can I go?_

_Yes_. I said, knowing by telling him that I was asking for a lot more than I bargained for.


	2. Chapter 2

Mea culpa. Mea culpa. Sorry it took me soooo long to update. :-) Here is the long awaited 2nd chapter.

I had only been to the Keep once before. Its sheer size still astounded me. Saetan met us at the door. He rolled his eyes when he saw Daemonar, it seemed to be a pretty customary greeting for my brother. Just as customary as Daemonar's arrogant disregard for our grandfather. I wanted to laugh, but knew it was the last thing that was needed at the moment. Saetan was barefoot. It took me a moment to reconcile the grandpapa I knew with what I had read. His black turtleneck sweater was wrinkly. He ran a hand through his graying hair and sighed.

"Hello, Daemonar."

Silence.

I jabbed my brother in the ribs. "Oh?" He startled. "Hello," he smiled malignantly. "Grandpappy."

Saetan puffed up a bit, but stayed silent. He was used to this. It had become routine. "Okay, puppy."

Daemonar barked. We all laughed. Actually, Saetan fizzed, but that was beside the point. By the time we were all leaning on each other to keep upright, Draca came in.

She shook her head. "Sso you have come. We have been waiting, little Ssisster." The sibilant voice startled us out of our hysterics. Daemonar straightened up immediately. "You brought the Eyrien. He iss hiss father'ss sson."

Geoffery stepped around the corner, and seemed surprised to see them. Catching Draca's last comment, he added: "Little hell hounds, both."

A ghost of a smile touched Draca's ageless face. "Sso it would sseem. Come, Lorn wisshess to ssee you."

I looked at Daemonar, slowly realizing that she was speaking to me. I followed her, glancing back at the three men, hoping for some assurance. The lower chambers of the Hall took a long time to reach. It gave me plenty of time to imagine what Lorn, Prince of Dragons, would look like. Father had told me he was huge. I knew that was as close as he would ever come to saying that the dragon had scared him shitless. Torches flared to life on either side of the giant chamber and I could hear the woosh of air as the giant doors on the other side were swung open. _This is it._ I had no idea what would come next.

"He wisshess to ssee you alone." Draca said once we reached the doors.

I stopped dead. "Alone?" She nodded. Biting my lip, I stepped through the doors. There was a large throne on the other end of the room — chamber — dungeon — whatever it was.

Anduvian.

I jumped. The deep reptilian voice continued to echo in my mind. Lorn shifted his massive bulk and fixed his huge eyes on me. My mouth went dry.

"Lorn." What does one say to a dragon? _Hello, when was the last time you ate? Because if it was a long time ago, I'm leaving. No, that would never do. Those scales are fabulous, are they real? No. What's on the menu . . . . . I hope it's not fried Eyrien . . . . . Again, absolutely not. Are you the reason the landen population is so low? No — then he would eat me. What do you do in your spare time? Find a way to eliminate the cockroach population by breathing fire . . . . . talk about a long day. The restaurant's special for the day is baked Eryien dusted with cheese crumbles with a side of hot sauce . . . . . . _

The dragon looked amused. I do not eat Eryiens, Anduvian, there is no need for you to worry. Though I have heard, from some, that they taste like rubber bands.

I wasn't sure whether I wanted to laugh or be sincerely concerned for the dragon's mental health. "What did you want to talk to me about?" Mother Night, I sound like an idiot.

Your court.

Lovely. Wonderful. I haven't given it much thought.

The dragon snorted, causing dust to swirl all around me. I figured as much.

"What is that supposed mean?" I felt childish being so defensive. Who was he to care if I did not plan to set up a court within the next few years? Ever, actually, but I wasn't going to tell him that.

He shook his head, his dark eyes sparkling. Dreamss may survive forever, but the flessh is alwayss temporary.

"You are telling me this because . . . . . ." I liked being Eyrien. It was a good excuse for being a smart ass.

Asskavi will need a Queen when the dreamss are gone.

I really didn't like where this conversation was headed. I had never really thought about Jaenelle not being from the long lived races. It seemed as though she would always be there. Always. I suppose that is just a daughter's hope. "What do you want from me?"

A Queen.


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks for all the reviews! A lot of people asked how everything happened, so I wrote this as the first part of an explanation. Read, review, and enjoy!

Flashback, Lucivar's POV . . . . .

I dashed into the Hall, grinning like a lunatic. I couldn't wait to congratulate Daemon. I laughed as I ran, the Sadist – a father! I took the stairs three at a time. The corridors went by in a blur. I was an uncle!

Then I hit it. I crossed the threshold into the room and ran head first into what felt like a block of ice. It was so cold. The floor was slick with a thin layer of ice. Crystals formed on my damp hair. My breath came out like a white cloud. I had to use Craft to keep from being thrown backwards by the psychic storm. I wasn't alone. There was something here. A fiend of the Darkness. Something cold. Something savage. The Sadist.

A curse died before it left my lips. A long nailed hand whispered over my neck. I shivered.

"What's wrong?" Never let a predator smell fear. I trembled. Daemonar . . . . Marian . . . . . I knew Daemon wouldn't hesitate to kill me. I didn't fear death, but I did fear for my wife and child. What would this do to the Sadiablo family? A group of people that had only just come back together? Yet I knew that I had no power over Daemon when he went cold, Hell's fire! I would be a fool if I thought I ever had control over Sadi. Where was Jaenelle? There was something terribly wrong.

There was only a voice. "Tell me why I shouldn't tear you apart."

"Bastard . . . ." I licked my lips. It was so cold! "I'm your brother." I knew it was futile. Daemon only asked that question when the answer didn't matter. "You're my boy's uncle . . . . ."

"And you're my daughter's father." The shield dropped. Daemon was leaning against the far wall – hands in pockets, calm as could be, but his eyes were dull and tired. He looked pained. "Are you going to deny it?"

I couldn't speak, or think. "What? That isn't possible!"

"Don't lie to me." _I've been lied to all my life, all I want is the truth._ Daemon didn't say it out loud.

"It . . . isn't possible. I never mounted her, Daemon, and you know it."

Something shifted in the frozen depths of his eyes. "I know it."

"Then . . . ."

"Do you know what this does to the Sadiablo family?"

I'd already considered it. "Yes."

"Do you know what it would do to Saetan?"

"It would . . . . ." I trailed off.

"Exactly."

"But who —."

Long nails whispered over my back, and pricked my throat. I wondered if this was Daemon's way of making sure he had someone's attention. It worked. "Who?" Daemon laughed. "Prick, you cannot be serious. There is only one person who would do that to Saetan."

"Hekatah."

Daemon nodded. "Yes, Hekatah."

"But . . . . she's dead."

"The spells didn't break when she was destroyed."

The room seemed to spin, I shook my head and tried to focus. "How . . . ."

"I don't know." It had a terrible finality to it.

I braced myself against the wall, the ice melting where my palm pressed against it. "How do you know?"

_Wings Yasi. She has wings._

I shuddered. _Oh, Daemon, _I thought to myself,_ You really are our father's son._

"How is Jaenelle?"

"Shaken."

"Hell's fire, Daemon, of course she's shaken!"

Daemon snarled. I shut my mouth. "One of us has to tell Saetan."

"I will."

Daemon actually looked relieved. I could understand why.

"I needs to come from me, beside you and him are still . . . ." I stopped before I said something that might get me killed - or possibly just maimed beyond all recognition. I tossed him an arrogant grin, such that I could muster in this freezing room, and turned around to leave.

"Thanks, Prick."

"Anytime, Bastard."


	4. Chapter 4

Painful Existence: chapter 4

When I returned to the eyrie three days later, I immediately could sense that something was wrong. Everything around me was silent and forcibly hushed. Daemonar sensed it too, for he did not try to do anything arrogant. His lean body was tense and alert. We cautiously approached the eyrie, and could sense both of our parents inside. I slowly opened the door and peered inside. The first thing that I saw was Marian, wrapped in Father's arms, sobbing. Her whole body convulsed with each breath.

"What's wrong?" I asked quietly. The same question could be seen in my brother's eyes.

Mother's eyes flickered and settled on my. A great sob came from her as she wrapped me in her arms. I still had no idea what was going on. Neither did Daemonar, if looks are anything to go by. "Bless the Darkness! You're alive!" My eyes turned to my father, but he looked away.

"What is going on?" Daemonar's deep voice cut through Mother's weeping.

"Anduvian, sit down." Father motioned for me to sit beside him. "This is something that I wish had never happened, but it did."

"Wha--"  
"Let me finish. Six Eyrien women were found brutally raped, broken, and murdered." He stopped and looked at me.

"Who?"

He gave me the names. Each was more painful than the last. All of them, all six, were close friends. I had seen all of them the day before I left to the Hall. I felt a cold chill break out on my skin, and a lump form in my stomach. I felt nauseous. My gut lunged viciously and I dashed outside to vomit. I felt Daemonar's hand on my shoulder. Salty tears pricked my eyes. After a trembling moment of shock, a sudden wave of cool washed over me. I straightened and walked back inside.

"Who is responsible?"

Father shook his head. "I do not know, but the bastards will pay. Dearly."

"Yes, they will." My own voice seemed foreign to my ears. "Is there a way to find them?"

He nodded. "Yes . . . ."

"Teach me."

His golden eyes widened. "I can't."

"Anduvian!" My mother screamed.

It hurt to do so, but I ignored my sobbing mother. "Yes, you can."

Lucivar snarled. "I can't! I don't know how!"

I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out. After a second, I spoke, "But you said. . . . "

"There is a way!" He stood and began pacing the room. "But I do not know it."

"Then tell me who does! I will not let this threat to Ebon Rih go unanswered for!"

Lucivar was sudden quiet. "You are too young, Anduvian."

"I will rule here someday."

He shook his head violently. "What you would see. . . . . Anduvian, I am a warrior and . . . . . what I saw chilled me deeply."

"I don't care! Tell me who!"

"There is only one." He hung his head. For the first time in my life, I saw my father completely defeated.

"Who?"

His eyes flashed as he looked at me. "Who do you think?"

"Sadi."

"Yes."

Daemonar stepped up, he looked worried. "You can't do this, Andie."

"I can and I will." I snarled. Yes, I was afraid. Yes, I knew it might break me to see what I would see. But, truthfully, I didn't care. Only anger and fury had a place in my heart now.

My brother put a restraining hand on my shoulder. "Be careful."

"I'm going back to the Hall." Lucivar looked at me and shook his head slowly. ::Be careful.:: His thought filled my mind. He stepped forward and wrapped me in a tight embrace. ::May the Darkness be with you, daughter.::


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5. There are numerous time brakes in this chapter, shown by . Read, review, enjoy!**

I stared across the blackwood desk into those cold, bored eyes. Daemon looked at me, his fingers forming a steeple as he did so. "Stop staring at me, dammit," I snarled, slamming my fist onto the desk. "Will you do it or not?"

"I see what he means." Daemon said quietly.

"What?" I snapped.

"They get feisty when they're riled."

My crimson nails dug into the desk, leaving deep scores in the wood. "I'm not hear to play games, uncle."

"Don't call me that."

Even before I said it, I knew of the word's history. I needed to get him on my side, and I was not getting it by sweet talk. My voice was flat when I said, "Yes or no."

"You are a child."

"I am a Queen."

Daemon glared at me. "Ah, yes, I forgot." He smirked. "The little girl pretends to be a Queen, but the second she walks on to the killing field . . . . then what? Does she stand her ground? No. She crumbles."

"Look at me." Those gold eyes bore into my own as I spoke again. "Do I look like I give a rat's ass?"

He blinked, and then laughed. "Feisty, feisty."

"Answer me!"

Daemon looked taken aback. His fine black brows were raised well above their normal level. "Excuse me?"

I stood up and stormed over to him. A fist aimed at his pretty little nose should do the trick. How dare he brush me aside? The cold hit me then. It started at my fist and worked its way up my body. Cold ropes slithering around me, twisting, writhing. I gasped and choked for air when my lungs became restricted. Damn. Thinking became hard. I couldn't breathe, much less think of anything coherent. Fighting was utterly useless, so it was only rational that I stop fighting. Of course, everyone knows how rational I am. I took a sweeping dive to the Sapphire. Of course, he was there to meet me. Thinking I, like witches on their virgin night, was trying to escape the pain. Fool. He didn't want me to get hurt, and that was exactly what I knew he would do. Using his own net of protection as a spring, I hurtled back up. The force of my own strength, coupled with what he had wrapped around me burst the icy bonds that had enveloped, by that time, my entire body.

As soon as I was free, my legs buckled and I collapsed on the ground, gasping for air. Daemon rushed over to me, and propped my head up.

"Andie! Are you trying to get yourself killed?" He snarled.

I smirked, and coughed, "Bastard." I saw a ghost of a smile cross his face before my world went black.

I felt a smooth hand brush the hair away from my face. After a while, my eyes fluttered open to find Jaenelle sitting beside me. She did not look angry, but concerned. I was exhausted, I knew that my jewels were drained. My whole body ached as if I had been beaten with a sledge hammer. I guess that, considering what I had done, I was very lucky. Most people don't play around with the Sadist and live to tell about it. No matter, I'd chew his ass out later. Darkness, I'm beginning to sound like an Eyrien. That alone is a frightening thought.

"You were foolish." Jaenelle's velvety voice brought me out of my pitiful reverie. I bowed my head, perhaps I was. "But," her sapphire eyes were lit with amusement, "I would have done the same thing."

"Really?" She nodded.

"However, I don't think I would have mentioned rats' asses." I realized, then, that I would never live it down. Mother Night, what is the Sadiablo family coming to?

Three days later I found myself back at the Keep. Daemon grabbed my arm and drug me down to the dragon den. He held a ball of witchlight above our heads to illuminate the pathway. Lorn was probably quite sick of me by now.

Once we reached the dragon, Daemon took a comfortable seat between two of the mighty tail spikes. Too bad he didn't take a seat _on_ one of them, but never mind that.

"Ssshe is angry with you." Daemon shrugged. "What do you want of me?" Lorn's sibilant voice echoed through the chamber. I felt the two males communicate through a spear thread, damn them. "I sssee. Are you sssure, Sssadi?"

"Yes."

Lorn turned to me. "Do you know how you came to be, child?"

I turned a quizzical eye to Daemon. "What, did you need a refresher course on reproduction or something?"

Lorn growled. Maybe being arrogant wasn't the best way out of this. My mistake. "Sssilence." A few small stones shuddered on the floor. I faced him, trying not to wince. "A ssspell, child. A cursssed ssspell." And then everything went black. Again. Dammit.

When I opened my eyes, I saw an older woman sitting at a table, her fingers dancing over a complex web. I wanted to get closer, to examine the delicate threads, but as soon as I turned toward it, I had to stumble back. It was contaminated, somehow. Repulsive. I cringed as I saw the grey growth creeping along the strands. The woman had a gleam in her eye that I could not place. Who was she? I watched her turn from the web and scan the pages of a book next to her. Her lips lifted into a feral grin as she began working again. And then she began to whisper to herself. I found myself unable to move.

"She will purge the Realms," _Jaenelle?_ How did this lecherous creature know my mother? "Yes, she is too bound by honor to do anything else. Like him, bound by the precious Protocol." She laughed. "Oh, Saetan, you will pay for that." I blinked, who was this bitch? "And she will survive. She is too strong to die for that, damn her. But she will pay for ruining all I've worked for." A chilling laugh filled the room. "She loves the Sadist, so it will have to be the halfbreed." I snarled at the insult, but she could not hear me. The woman picked up the web and muttered a spell that I could not understand. A vibrant flash of blue burned my eyes, when the light had faded the woman held a small orb in her hands. She brought the orb to her chest and it seemed to spread out around her and soak into her skin. I cocked my head, what in Hell's fire? The woman laughed and ran her hands up and down her arms, as if to rub the spell into her body.

"When they destroy me, this little darling will be caught in it and pierce that bitch's heart." She smiled to herself, making me shudder.

A male voice echoed through the chamber. "Heketah!"

She ran a hand through her hair and looked at me. Did she see me? I took a step back. "Coming!" She turned and left the room, leaving me alone.

Suddenly, I was back in reality. Sadi was looking at me, not quite amused but not completely sober. "Now do you underssstand, little Eyrien?" I looked up into Lorn's huge eyes and shoved my shaking hands into my pockets. I nodded. The spell was swept up by the Purge when Heketah was destroyed, and then the backlash had carried it to Jaenelle. I had to admire the pure genius of it . . . . of me. I must have grimaced because, Daemon spoke.

"You see now, don't you?"

"Yes, I do."

Daemon stood and stretched like a cat. I wonder if he purrs? His next words caught me off guard. "Then I will teach you."

**Author's note:** Being merely a simple landen, I don't know how spells work, so I hope this chapter made at least a little sense. Lol. (Begs shamelessly for reviews)


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

I allowed Daemonar to throw his arm around my shoulder without much fuss. Daemon strode ahead of us, ignoring my brother's saucy jibes. Lorn had dismissed us with an airy snort, and Daemonar had greeted us at the entrance to the chamber. I did not bother to ask how he had known where we were.

"We will stay here at the Keep. Your training starts tomorrow at dawn." The Black Widow ahead of us said curtly. Then he entered into one of the rooms off of the hall, leaving us.

Daemonar stopped and looked at me thoughtfully. "Are you alright? You look pale."

"I'm fine." He put a hand on my shoulder and gave it a slight squeeze.

"Andie, I just don't want you to get hurt."

I tried to pull away. "I don't need your protection." I mumbled.

He smiled. "I know." He pulled me close and rested his chin on top of my head. "Don't be stupid." I snorted. Me, stupid? Never. He pulled back and looked at me sternly. "I'm serious."

"I'll do my best."

He ruffled my hair playfully. "I know you will." He grabbed my wrist and yanked me down the hallway. "Come on little witchling, you have a lot to do in the morning."

I would soon find that neither of us had any idea as to how much "a lot" really was.

I wished I hadn't woken up that morning. I really, truly wish I hadn't. I sat down on the stone bench and wiped a trickle of nervous sweat from my forehead. Daemon just _had_ to announce that I would be making the Offering. At six in the bloody morning. It was not really the morning part that bothered me, it was simply that he chose for me to do it without my knowing. If Jaenelle was not my mother, I would have found a very sneaky underhanded way to castrate him. Let's see how menacing the Sadist is without his balls.

I shivered and looked at the stone slab in front of me, placing my hands on its cold surface. What did Saetan say to do? Go down as far as I could? Shit. How far was "as far as I could?" Until it hurt? Until I couldn't mentally go any farther? Until my brain exploded all over this nice stone? I can't believe the male intellect sometimes.

I let myself drift down slowly, as he had instructed, letting my mind float down like a feather riding a soft breeze. I watched the colors around me. Mother Night, this was bizarre. Yellow lights flashed and danced around me, beckoning yet austere. After a few moments, I was encircled by Rose. I continued my mental trip down the ranks. I remember Green being particularly dazzling, a rich forest color. I felt as though I could bask forever in it. However, when I hit the Sapphire, things began to change. Everything felt . . . restricted and tight around me. I ignored the slight buzz in my head and kept going. When I first saw the Red I had to gasp. It was beautiful, in a dangerous, blood washed way. The Gray was lit by flashes of white. It reminded me of the mountains in Glacia. I was amazed I had made it that far. I reached the Ebon-Gray with some apprehension. Common sense told me I couldn't go farther, but it didn't hurt me to. Saetan said to go as far as I could, so I kept going. Shit. Everything went black.

When I came back to reality, my knees buckled. My head felt like it was about to implode. I was too fatigued to even care what level I had descended to. If I had descended at all. My eyes fluttered closed, and I felt two strong arms wrap around me. The hands felt rough against my overly sensitive skin.

"You are lucky, Anduvian Yassslana. You ssshould be dead, but sssomehow you are ssstill ssstanding." I heard Draca click her tongue as she dragged me away from the stone slab.

I hate feeling weak. My worst nightmare is to be one of those "damsels in distress," but here I go again, blacking out. I've done that a lot lately. Mother Night.

**A/N: Thank you all for the wonderful reviews on the previous chapters! They all made me smile!**


End file.
